Are you the type that tries to do it all on your own?

Do you think you are the only one that can do the best job?

Do you believe that if you don't do it, no one else will?

Do you feel resentful of others because they ask you for help?

If you answered yes to any of these questions you need to learn the skill of delegation.

If you do not delegate, you hurt yourself in more ways than one.

First you become resentful of others even if you volunteered to do the boring time consuming job in the first place.

Then instead of appreciating your efforts people will soon come to expect it and may even criticize your efforts.

One day when you can't perform the task they will quickly blame you for their inabilities.

Finally if you wear yourself out, you won't have a life.

When you try to do everything yourself you end up hurting those around you.

It seems ironic that by helping others too much, you can actually hurt them.

In other words you "Kill them with kindness."

When you do everything for a person you actually train them to be helpless.

Without goals, responsibilities and personal successes they cannot build up their confidence and self-esteem.

Instead of becoming independent they become dependant on others.

Instead of becoming reliable they become unreliable.

Are those the kind of people you want to be with?

Or would you rather have individuals who have been taught personal responsibility?

Many people today have full time careers on the go.

It is unfair to expect others to do your share without a fair exchange.

For example: "Is it fair to expect one person to be responsible for all the household chores if everyone in the home goes to school or works full time?"

A vicious cycle is created when people feel guilty because they aren't perfect.

This guilt forces them to have less expectations of others.

It also increases their desire to be perfectionists.

Stop the cycle, be realistic and start delegating.

Soon you will realize that people are not helping you by doing their share they are helping themselves.

Have a meeting to discuss priorities, evenly distribute the jobs, and make sure that everyone clearly understands their jobs.

Make the meeting as calm and enjoyable as possible.

Food and beverages always relax people.

Look for ideas from the group to make the chores fun or easier.

Remember, persuasion is always better than force.

By creating guidelines for the common good everyone benefits.

Meet weekly to discuss how things are going, swap tasks, and listen to suggestions.

Make sure the routines are running smoothly (not perfectly!)

Be patient. Remember everyone needs practice in developing habits and skills.

No two people are exact and everyone has their own ways of doing things.

It is amazing what people can do by themselves when no one is looking over their shoulders.

If you are asked for advice give it gently.

Share how you overcame similar problems from your own past.

In return you will receive honesty, respect and understanding.